(A letter I will never send, to a mother who would never read it anyway)
Non-fiction / Memoir
Date Published: 06-01-2023
None of us were raised by perfect mothers, nor can we ourselves be perfect parents. But some mothers sure do know how to ruin a life, well, almost. I say almost because, although my mother’s parenting left severe damage in its path and, regrettably, and inevitably, shaped some of the decisions I made, I am grateful to have realized the issues I was facing. So, I now have the opportunity to properly address those issues, to minimize their impact on my life.
This book holds the words I would express to my mother, if I thought she cared to acknowledge my feelings at all.
Many others have been “raised” by narcissistic mothers and have been deeply affected. But it is still possible to live happy lives, free of Mom’s burden. Writing has helped me immensely in this regard.
MY THOUGHTS
This was everything I expected and more. Of course, this is an open letter to the author’s mother, so it’s direct and full of attitude and emotion. She speaks fairly and is a very reasonable, giving credit where it’s due, and seemingly well adjusted person, though not without years of therapy. Her mother is clearly a narcissist, but her dad seems to have been a good guy and I wish for her sake she’d had more of him in her life.
The author goes into a great deal of detail about mental health. At times it even reads like a psychology textbook. She speaks on her depression and PTSD, as well as her teenage years that were especially hard and left lasting effects. My heart aches for her. What kind of mother doesn’t care when finding out her daughter was assaulted?
In the end, she talks of her life now and her own experiences as a mother. I felt happy for her, and I sincerely hope that she makes her mother a miniscule part of her life, if a part of her life at all. I would absolutely cut ties for good.
Bottom Line
This book was as heartbreaking as it was uplifting. It really shows the effects we have as parents on our children and I am happy for the author finding herself despite such a lonely and lost adolescence. I found the book to be satisfying and in some ways relatable.
About the Author
Eva Tillman published her first work in 2023. However, she has enjoyed writing since she was a teenager.
She lived in several regions of the United States before she finally settled in the West with its palm trees and almost constant sunshine. She loves to read, eat, and help others feel good about themselves.
Many people, including Eva, have faced trauma of different types. Unfortunately, the hands of time cannot be turned back. But it is possible to live happy and successful lives, contentedly coping with the slowly dissipating effects of the trauma.
In her most personal work, “Dear Mom”, Eva does her best to express herself as she would if she were writing to Mother herself. Perhaps one day Eva will deliver the book to its rightful recipient. For now, she enjoys the liberation of having poured out her true feelings.
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